15 June 2018

Just one more glance, I told myself. This is the end. But reality is different.

I hate feeling pain, but if you'd saw me then, you'd think otherwise. Why did I sit in an unending storm with an unopened umbrella.

Seemingly for no reason, tears would fall. You would wipe them away without even knowing why.

I wish I had given you the memory of a girl laughing. But when you think back now, all you'll see is sadness.

When I think of you now, the pain is dull. I used to feel an immature, starry-eyed love, but now all I feel is tired.

When I thought of the girl you love, I felt jealousy. But now I laugh at how simple I am. Isn't it natural?

I used to be angry at you. For playing with my heart in innocent ignorance. You love her, so you should know how I feel. Yet why do I feel that your head is in the clouds.

"Everyone has the strength to overcome these feelings." You say these obvious words while separating yourself from the situation.

Are you an outsider looking at me falling in love with a different version of you? I wish you wouldn't believe you understand.

I will smile at you from now on.

Even if it's a lie.

So I can be happy.